things that piss me off about black people


Aurora della Croix's The Gullible Girl's Guide to Gagging the Down-low Brother

i subscribe to a pr listserv, i get emails everyday about news in the black community. sometimes i get gems like an article about farrah gray (or dr. farrah gray – it’s honorary so it doesn’t really count). i normally just delete it when i see it. i didn’t today. perusing the article titles, the word down-low jumped out at me. i have always hated that word. i clicked the article title link. “Down-Low Brothers Watch Out — The Holy Grail for Women of Color Has Arrived.”

the following article popped up:

Down-Low Brothers Watch Out — The Holy Grail for Women of Color Has Arrived

New York, NY ( – AdC Publishing released a reference guide for women of color, which is destined to be a #1 Bestseller in the African-American and Latino communities.

Aurora della Croix’s The Gullible Girl’s Guide to Gagging the Down-low Brother! is indeed a mouth full; however, coupled with this alliterated mammoth title, comes an eye and ear full of valuable information for women of color.

Engaging…brilliantly written…an easy read, this raw…witty…sexy…and sometimes erotic tour de force is the first volume of a double volume set, and has been coined the holy grail for women of color who desire to increase their knowledge about the down-low brother (DLB).

Della Croix embraces the reader on an one-on-one level, and leads her/him on a lyrical journey through time and back. Along the way, della Croix tackles labels, as he candidly dispel some of the myths about men…straight, gay and down-low. Combining various ingredients such as self-help mantras, psychology, historical facts, anecdotes, fantasy, and profiles; sprinkled with an abundance of humor, this recipe ensures the reader is well-seasoned and empowered for entry into the sweltering, and abysmal black-hole known as the DLB psyche. A successful journey through this first volume arms the reader with the necessary basic tools and knowledge to defend herself against the chicanery of her current or future DLB.

Aurora della Croix is a native son of New York, the youngest of 11 children; and for eight years, he called Orangeburg, South Carolina, the birthplace of his mother, his home. He always had a passion for writing, and in 1989, he wrote, directed and produced his first off-Broadway play, “The Thin Line”, at the Sanford Meisner Theatre in New York City, which documented a confusing period in his life. The success of this play set him on the track to becoming one of the most entertaining authors and playwrights of the 21st Century, with a plethora of unpublished works ready to hit the presses, including the sequel to the current published title, a collection of poetry, a trilogy about a dysfunctional family, and an epic novel set in the 1700s which tells the story of a very suspect connection and bond between two southern families–a slave family, and the family of a tobacco and cotton plantation.

For now, you can purchase Volume One of The Gullilble Girl’s Guide to Gagging the Down-low Brother! for $8.95 at

the down-low is a word that was created with hate (see r. kelly) and synonymous with j.l. king. straight black women hurl it around now like pleased to meet you. every man who is educated, dresses well, and attractive is suspected of being on the dl or down low. it’s aggravating. the idea of black masculinity is intertwined with underline stereotypes of black male identity. whenever i see that word something triggers in me. i think too many authors use that word to cash in on its supposed meaning.

i got all the way to the aurora’s bio (i have always been bothered by people you name their children aurora) and stopped when i read the word he. i read the first line “Aurora della Croix is a native son of New York, the youngest of 11 children; and for eight years, he called.” i missed native son. then i googled aurora. i didn’t get anyway. i went to the website listed in the article. you have to register pre-order information to get into the site. i just want to know why. obviously, aurora is a man. i understand that. what kind of man, i don’t know. that really doesn’t matter. why do gay men go after each other so viciously to add to the already demeaning and self-destroying dialogue.

i want a funeral for the down low and dl. the d word.

i have so many questions.

1. are you trans aurora?

2. why is the word gagging in your book title aurora (i should have known something was fishy when i read that word)?

3. who designed your book cover (they need they’re computer to be smashed into a million little pieces and forced to take a graphic design class)?

4. why?

5. i need pictures ( i know that isn’t a question)

6. della Croix? Really?


1 Comment

Filed under The Written Word

One response to “things that piss me off about black people

  1. First, thank you for taking the time to read the press release, and for taking the time to express your opinion. I agree with you, the usage of “DL” and/or “Down-low” should be buried; however, before this can be done, men need to be more accountable and responsible about their sexuality. As it is unfortunate, until men can rise to the occasion (no pun intended) and embody these characteristics, there shall be no funeral for this label.

    It is very clear to me that you have not read my book, as your comments are indicative of someone who is not thoroughly informed, at least as it relates to the reason for the book, and the intended goal and objective. Being someone with southern roots, I am incline to say, “bless your little heart”, which is a polite way of saying, “you’re talking out of your ass.”

    I won’t make it easy for you…read the book, then if you have comments and/or feedback, I would relish the opportunity to engage you in an intelligent conversation based on the mutual understanding of the topic, and not because the term “DL” or “down-low” pisses you off. Really!

    In the meantime, I will answer your questions, because I do find some of them amusing, if not valid. (And no, I’m not being sarcastic and/or facetious).

    Q1: No, I am not a “trans” anything. I am a gay man.

    Q2: There’s nothing “fishy” about the word “gagging”. The root “gag” in gay colloquialism means to shock someone, and/or to leave him/her speechless. Again, if you had read the book, this question would be a mute point.

    Q3: Okay, you’re entitled to your opinion, as art is subjective. I like the cover, as it captures the essence of the book, which…again, you have not read. However, if you can do better, by all means, send it to me, as Volume 2 is due out in the spring.

    Q4: Read the book.

    Q5: Pictures of what…of whom? The book has pictures, albeit the book is not a popup. If you are looking for picture of me, there’s a cameo on the back cover. You also can see this photo at, click “Author” on the main menu. (And no, I am not wearing contacts…my eyes are naturally slate-blue; and yes, both my parents were African-Americans.) (Just being proactive to what I assume will be your follow-up comments and/or question.)

    Q6: Yes, really. Although this is not my given name, it is a spiritual name that has much meaning and significance to me. We can discuss this in more detail when we sit down for coffee.

    Again, I sincerely appreciate your comments and your time.


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